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More bad news

After a hi-res CT scan last night and a meeting with a surgeon today, my dad has told me that he also has multiple tumors in his liver, and that there is no surgical option. He will have a minor procedure tomorrow morning to get a biopsy and to place a stent to open up a duct that is being blocked by the tumor. Hopefully this will improve his liver function, and make him better able to withstand Chemo, that they are talking about starting next week.

Chemo is a palliative measure at this point. It may prolong his life and give him a better quality of life for longer, but it is unlikely to cure him. We can hope.

Bad news

This past Wednesday I learned that my father has a 4cm mass in or on the head of his pancreas. This was discovered while he was on a business trip to Norway. The good news is that he lives near MD Anderson Cancer center in Houston, one of the best in world. The bad news is that pancreatic cancer patients have a less than 5% chance of living past 5 years, even under optimum conditions. In worse cases, the prognosis can be a little over 4 months. My father may not live to see Christmas.

Keith Anderson

Snow!

SNOW! It snowed in Redlands today! It snowed in "Sunny and 72" Southern California (and Redlands is not up in the mountains...) What's up with that? I'll have to see if I can remember how to host pictures. It was purty...

OK, OK, it was about an inch of fluff that rapidly turned into slush. All over SoCal there were people doing 20 on the freeway because they heard snow was slippery. Never mind that it melted as soon as it hit tarmac, and was no worse than any other rainy day.

Keith Anderson, NP

Long time no post.

Hmm. Six months since my last post again. Drat. Well more later on numerous topics - Lasers, autism, other toys, new coffee maker. Busy time.

Also, check out the Epocrates search bar on the right. Look up your medications!

Dell Home Systems XPS M2010

Dell Home Systems XPS M2010

OH MY GOD! I'm in love. Never mind that the thing costs 9 grand (totally tricked out, that is...) and weighs over 20Lbs! DualCor, 20" monitor, removable bluetooth keyboard for cryin' out loud! Its my ultimate laptop. Will somebody buy me one? Please? Please? I'll be your friend...

Joe Haldeman Diary, April-May 2003

I just found the funniest commentary on the Iraq war. It was written and posted in April of 2003, by Joe Haldeman, Hugo and Nebula award-winning science fiction author. I'll post the text, and then a link to the actual site, so you can see the rest of it:

I just got this delicious observation from Steven Utley, by way of Michael Bishop and Greg Frost:
"This is the Vietnam II Preflight Check.
1. Cabal of oldsters who won't listen to outside advice? Check.
2. No understanding of ethnicities of the many locals? Check.
3. National boundaries drawn in Europe, not by the locals? Check.
4. Unshakable faith in our superior technology? Check.
5. France secretly hoping we fall on our asses? Check.
6. Russia secretly hoping we fall on our asses? Check.
7. China secretly hoping we fall on our asses? Check.
8. SecDef pushing a conflict the JCS never wanted? Check.
9. Fear we'll look bad if we back down now? Check.
10. Corrupt Texan in the White House? Check.
11. Land war in Asia? Check.
12. Rightists unhappy with outcome of previous war? Check.
13. Enemy easily moves in/out of neighboring countries? Check.
14. Soldiers about to be dosed with our own chemicals? Check.
15. Friendly fire problem ignored instead of solved? Check.
16. Anti-Americanism up sharply in Europe? Check.
17. B-52 bombers? Check.
18. Helicopters that clog up on the local dust? Check.
19. Infighting among the branches of the military? Check.
20. Locals that cheer us by day, hate us by night? Check.
21. Local experts ignored? Check.
22. Local politicians ignored? Check.
23. Local conflicts since before the USA has been a country? Check.
24. Against advice, Prez won't raise taxes to pay for war? Check.
25. Blue water navy ships operating in brown water? Check.
26. Use of nukes hinted at if things don't go our way? Check.
27. Unpopular war? Check.
Vietnam II, you are cleared to taxi."
Actually, I think it would work better with just the first ten, or the strongest ten. Once you start committing analogy, though, I guess it's hard to stop.
Joe

Joe Haldeman Diary, April-May 2003

What has to be one of the funniest short pieces that I've seen in The Onion in a long time.

Laid-Off Zoologist Goes On Tranquilizing Rampage

SAN DIEGO-Twelve San Diego Zoo visitors and two employees were brutally sedated Monday, when laid-off zoologist Dr.

LinkedIn

OK folks. I just joined LinkedIn (check out the button on the sidebar). Joining gives you access to gobs of other people, and you can search by lots of different criteria (name, education, profession, location etc.)

Give it a try.

Dakota's anti-choice law

So. South Dakota's govenor signed the new anti-abortion bill into law. I recommend the Lysistrata solution. If the men of South Dakota are worried that women will want to end unplanned pregnancies, then the women should remove the problem. No sex, no unplanned pregnancies. Case closed. See how long they last.

Life reassessment

The main reason I haven't been fencing recently is that my wife and I have been re-examining out lives, in an effort to simplify. If you have been following this blog, you will have seen that my son is autistic. My wife and I recently attended a 4-day parent training for an autism therapy program called Relationship Development Intervention (RDI), developed by a man called Dr. Steve Gutstein.
RDI is the first therapy system that actually seems to treat autism. The most common therapy system for autism is called ABA, or Applied Behavioral Analysis. ABA tends to use behaviorist theories to get kids to behave well (no rocking or head banging, or whatever) by rewarding them for positive behaviors (sit in the chair for 5 minutes and I'll give you a cookie...) It turns out this does not teach the kids to think for themselves, so they still freak out if faced with a new situation. Dr. Gutstein actually thinks that ABA only teaches the kids to be more autistic.
RDI, on the other hand, attempts to recreate the parent-child, master-apprentice relationship, so that the kid can learn how to deal with new situations, by seeing their parents do it. You can read all about it (including a paper that should be published soon, that demonstrates autistic kids getting better - that is no longer testing as autistic) here.

Anyway, part of the process is to see what can go from your lives to make way for time with your child. We got rid of basically everything for a while (hence the no fencing) to see what we could really do without, and what we needed. Time for ourselves (as adults), especially exercise, was definitely a needful thing. I have also learned that there is an fencing group starting up at the gym for the university that the hospital I work at is a part of. They also meet at a time shortly after I get out of work. I'm really hoping this works out.

I passed!

WooHoo! I passed my national certification exam! I was a little nervous there. I know I usually do well on multiple choice exams, but the questions were tricky, and the testing environment less than perfect. Anyway, I'm now Keith Anderson, APRN,BC, NP. That's: Advanced Practice Registered Nurse, Board Certified. What a mouthful. Thats nothing... If I include all the degrees as well, its: Keith Anderson, APRN,BC, NP, BA, BSN, MSN.

Ain't I a little full of myself this evening?

Bibilical interpretation?

Earlier this week, I heard a story on NPR about a Baptist preacher from Kansas called Fred Phelps, (the link is to a Wikipedia article on the man) who preaches that homosexuality is an abomination, that everyone in the US is going to hell, and that sodomy should be a capital offence. Thats right, if two men or two women have sex, or even (in some states) if a married couple engage in oral sex, they are "guilty" of sodomy, and Fred wants them put to death. In the spirit of equality, I'll provide a link to his website, but be warned - Fred and friends refuse to use anything but the derogatory term "fag" to describe homosexuals, and the language on the website can get pretty extreme. If you want more information, check out his website here. There are links to plenty of anti-Fred websites at the bottom of the Wikipedia article.

My usual response to anyone that rabid is to quote the "open Letter to Dr. Laura:"

Dear Dr. Laura, Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to best follow them.

a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

c) I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

d) Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

e) I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

f) A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an Abomination (Lev 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

g) Lev 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev 19:27. How should they die?

i) I know from Lev 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev 24:10-16) Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging. Your devoted disciple and adoring fan.

I've always wondered how people who are so rabid about the bible being the absolute word of God can on the one hand have no problem with the idea of stoning someone to death for sodomy, yet have no problem eating pork or shellfish, and would never consider selling their willful daughters into slavery...

All things in moderation...

Certification test done

Well, that was brutal. The questions were about as hard as I expected, but glare from the fluorescent lights combined with the black text on a white screen for 2 1/2 hours gave me a pounder of a headache. That and the Fort Knox-like security (sign in, sign out, empty your pockets into this locker, give me 2 forms of ID....) makes a body feel a little paranoid.

Its over now. Just a 2 week or so wait for the results.

National Certification test today

Well, if you've actually read this blog (don't worry, I probably wouldn't either...), you will know that I'm a nurse practitioner working in orthopedics. Today I have to take a test through the ANCC to be nationally certified. This is useful to me for several reasons:

1. It will allow me to apply for a Universal Provider Identification Number (UPIN) that will allow me to bill Medicare if I ever work in the outpatient setting.
2. If I ever move to another state, it may be required to work as a nurse practitioner.
3. My boss says I need to have it.

It is also a major pain. I haven't been in school for over 5 years, an this test is entirely on "what the book says to do" rather than on "what actually works in real life." I've been in practice long enough that the later is what I actually use. I've also worked in ortho for 5 years - I've had to really study to be able to remember what serology test turns positive first in hepatitis B infection (Hep B surface antigen), or that acute myelogenous leukemia (AML) is the most common leukemia in adults. I deal with bones and joints. Not primary care. Wish me luck.

Some Reasons Gay Marriage is Wrong :-)

Just passing this on. I got it in my church's monthly newsletter. It makes so much sense, I had to share it...

Some things are so illogical that we must laugh at them or we will cry over them. The homophobia of some parts of America falls into this category. Here, for you to laugh (or cry) about are Some Reasons Gay Marriage is Wrong:

1. Being gay is not natural. And, as you know, Americans have always rejected unnatural things, such as eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning;
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall;
3. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn’t changed at all. Hmmm, so women are still property, blacks still can’t marry whites, and divorce is still illegal?
4. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed. The sanctity of Brittany Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed;
5. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn’t be allowed to marry.
6. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents raise only straight children.
7. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That is why we, as a society, expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
8. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just as we haven’t adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

I hate Redlands Unified School District!

Well, we finally heard back from RUSD. They denied our request to have the School psychologist's report removed from my son's file, but we have the right to appeal. They did put our letters into the file, so anyone who looks can see why we think the psychologist is wrong (18 pages worth of why she's wrong...) At this point, I'm not sure where to go. We could hire a lawyer and go the "my lawyer can beat up you lawyer..." route, but that costs time and money. We could also just drop it, and work on maximizing the services we can get.

The Inland Regional Center (a California thing) has determined my son to be eligible for services through their system. This is interesting, because Regional centers are obliged to cover autism, but not asperger's syndrome. So they think he's autisic too...

I know that the school psychologist is not licensed as a clinical psychologist, educational psychologist, or marriage and family therapist in the state of California. To me that means she can't diagnose. Ah well, the battle continues.

Roast your own coffee for cheap!

Wow! I just discovered that its really easy to roast your own coffee at home! There are several websites selling coffee roasters for about $100-$200 (www.morebeer.com is one of them). I thought about that, but then I did a little poking on the internet, and I found that you can do it with a hot-air popcorn popper! I found the right kind at my local Goodwill, and paid 4 whole bucks. I then bought a pound of green Ethiopian Yirgacheffe beans from MoreBeer (I was going there anyway for brewing supplies). Roasting took 15 minutes (including all the setup, the cleanup and stringing the extension cord outside and rolling it back up again when I was done). I had to do the roasting outside because the one downside to a popcorn popper is that it smokes like a chimney. Small price to pay - NOTHING compares to the coffee you roast yourself! For more information, also check out SweetMaria's.

my2way

While I'm on the subject of music, what is up with The Cure? I'm pretty sure they're not together anymore, but how could they have had hits? Their music is great in the technical sense, but who else could write a tender love song ("I will always love you") that leaves wanting to slit your wrists?

Keith Anderson, NP

TSO

Oh yeah. Check out Trans-Siberian.com Their show Rocks!

Keith Anderson, NP